I am in the final stretch! Chemo 11, 12 and lucky number 13 have been flushed down the drain, AKA my body. There are so many things I learn about what chemotherapy can do to your body that I just never realized. A couple weeks ago, just before #11, I woke up to a popped blood vessel in my eye. Ummm… hello, where did you come from? Did my husband punch me in my sleep? Magic Eight Ball said, ‘very doubtful’. Checked in with my oncologist and he explained that chemo brings on dry eye, which I suffered from before all this shit started, and my broken blood vessel could have easily happened by simply rubbing my eye while I was sleeping. Super. Of course to be safe and make sure there is no underlying issue let’s schedule another appointment, this time for the eye doctor. I know you’re all sitting on the edge of your seat to find out… my eye is fine. Dilation confirmed there was no bleeding behind my eye.

One thing that chemo has not fully taken away from me is my stubbornness to not sit still. After all, I’ve shit to do. Between my own doctor appointments, kids appointments, errands, and life in general I feel I’m constantly on the move. Sure, sometimes I need to sit down, and I always nap after chemo treatments. Here is my exact Wednesday routine:

• 6am: wake up
• 6:30am: wake Jesse and get him breakfast
• 7:30am: walk Jesse to bus stop
• 8:30am: get Evan out the door
• 8:45am – 11am: chemotherapy
• 11:30am: lunch
• 12:30pm – 2:30pm: nap/rest
• 2:30pm: get Jesse from bus stop, get him ‘all the snacks’ and then pull hair out while helping with homework (hey, maybe THAT is what happened to my hair and chemo is just the front)
• 4pm: make dinner (love to grill on this day so I’m outside)

I also want to share one of the blankets I always wrap myself in for my ‘post chemo nap’.

Another reason I try to stay active is for the family. Cancer is a huge elephant in the room. We’re reminded everyday with my bald head, or my random yelps when my port pinches. If anyone in the house hears me yelp, the joke is to yell, “port pinch”. Yes, it’s standard phrase. Mentally, cancer takes a toll on everyone in the house, not just me. For me, making that extra effort to get up and do things is important. Not only for my kids, but for my own metal health. Fresh air and sun is amazing. Recently we took a trip to Starved Rock. I had never been, nor did I know much about what to expect. OMG!!! If you’ve ever been, you know. I had NO IDEA the amount of stairs. I guess in my mind I was thinking the hike would be gradual hills up and down, not 100 stairs up and down to take a picture at a lookout point. There is a running joke with my husband and a couple close friends and family. You really have to understand my sense of humor to appreciate the humor behind what I’m going to share. I live my life through lots of jokes, many dad jokes actually. I love puns. I love cheesy sayings. I make fun of myself because honestly, if you can’t make fun of yourself, are you even living? So quick background story. I was playing Kings in the Corner with my husband and my mom. I ‘accidentally’ cheated and was rightfully called out. Of course I tried to backpedal and play dumb, who wouldn’t? They weren’t letting me slide, jerks. So I had to do what was right, I reminded them, “I have cancer.” 😳 Can you believe it, they wouldn’t even let that fly. So I took the Joker card from an obscenely large novelty deck and slapped in on the table and said again, “I’m pulling my cancer card!” I now carry my ‘cancer card’ with me in my purse so I can pull it out at the right time. So far, it hasn’t gotten me anything!

So back to Starved Rock… As we’re walking up probably the 2,000th stair for the day, I stop and say, “Damnit Brian, I’m pulling my cancer card, carry me.” THAT is how hard this hike was. I tried to pull the cancer card. It didn’t work.🃏
The day was beautiful and as we continued to walk around the park we came across a sign that said, “You did it! Reward yourself with a beer or ice cream at The Lodge.” Excuse my language, but I’m pretty sure I said, “Fuck yeah!” We had a nice lunch on the patio, with a couple beers and headed home. Now again, I’m the one with cancer and felt like I just ran a marathon that I hadn’t trained for and yet 10 minutes into a jeep ride home, the kids were falling asleep. Light weights.

So I survived Starved Rock and you can too! Chemo 12 and lucky #13 have come and gone. Oncologist actually told me he might take out my last treatment just to give my body a rest before radiation starts. Meeting with radiation doctor on Tuesday to understand that process and then schedule a scan to pin point where radiation will be focused. I feel like I can see the light at the end of this journey/nightmare. If anything good has come out of this it’s that I’ve had so many women reach out and tell me they scheduled their mammogram because of me. Because I keep screaming from the top of Starved Rock lookouts, “Get your mammograms!” I’ve also had women reach out to me with their test results from their mammograms to get a better understanding of what the medical lingo even means. Do I know it all? Nope. Not even close. But I can still be that person that listens to their concerns about what it might say. Don’t be scared when your results say they want you to come back for an ultrasound. It likely just means you’re in the ‘Dense Breast Club’ and it’s important to go back for that ultrasound to get a better look at your boobs. Trust your doctors, but also ask questions. Your biggest advocate is you, and YOU are not alone. DBC in the da’ house. Get your mammogram.